Heard at the Office Today
Picking up in the middle of an end-of-the-day, walking-out-the-door office conversation about the infamous baby-versus-cobra video (in which a baby is allowed to 'play' with a cobra whose mouth has been sewn shut):
Me: I think it might be the worst thing I've ever seen that wasn't gory or pornographic.Rett: I actually felt sorrier for the cobra than for the baby.
Me: Why is that?
Rett: Because the cobra was saying to itself, "What's wrong? I should be killing this thing."
Me: Right. "WTF? Aw, snap!"
Rett: You can't say "WTF" and "snap".
Me: Yes, I can.
Rett: We've been over this.
Me: House says them. Well, he doesn't say "WTF", but he says "snap".
Rett: You're not as charming as House.
Me: Actually, I've already told David Smith he's the House of the company.
Rett: What did he say?
Me: He was down with it.
Rett: What you should have said was, "If you were smarter, you'd be the House of the company."
Me: Aw, snap!