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Why We Couldn't Prevent 9/11

The more you've worked in or around the government, the funnier this fake guest editorial from the Onion is:

Sept. 11 Could Not Have Been Prevented Without Accruing A Lot Of Overtime

By Condoleeza Rice

Esteemed members of the National Commission on Terrorist Attacks upon the United States, good afternoon. As National Security Advisor, my job is to coordinate the efforts of America's intelligence and defense agencies and report directly to the president. I was, and continue to be, in a unique position to understand the threats and dangers our nation faces. It is with utmost confidence and sincerity that I assure each and every one of you that there was no way the federal government could have prevented the horrific events of Sept. 11 without accruing an enormous amount of overtime.

My heart goes out to the families and loved ones of all those who died on that terrible day. Our prayers continue to be with you. Unfortunately, there was absolutely nothing we could have done to predict al-Qaeda's evil plot, without requiring many, many people to stay in the office past 5 p.m. ...


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Crap! That sounds like my current job! I really need to get out of D.C.

I was at State department when Colin Powell came in. Powell made some changes such as no more elaborate meals. If he visits serve him a hamburger. No meeting should run more than 1 hour. Three hour staff meetings shrank to 20 min. Don’t stay late. Powell planed to be home early so we should too. It was nice but in hindsight I wonder.

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